Giving Thanks for Ordinary Love
My husband and I didn’t celebrate Valentine’s Day in any extravagant way and I’m perfectly content with that. I did cook steaks at home that we ate while talking with our toddler in his high chair. We have an ordinary love that doesn’t require elaborate displays of affection. Instead, we love one another in the ordinary and simple moments of day to day life. Here’s what I mean by that.
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There was a Hallmark movie years ago called “The Magic of Ordinary Days” starring Keri Russell. I love Hallmark movies but this is my all-time favorite. It tells the story of a mail-order bride whose marriage begins as convenience, but both the husband and wife slowly fall in love with one another. It’s nothing fancy that happens. They are living their lives in ordinary ways and by doing ordinary things – but that still grows into love.
Here’s another example. There’s a folk song (by Neal & Leandra) called Old Love. I first heard it years ago when my Aunt and Uncle sang it at my Grandparents 40th wedding anniversary celebration. There was something about the words that stuck with me, even as a young girl, because that’s what I hoped for. The chorus goes like this…
“We’ve got an old love – one we will never will get tired of, one that fits us like an old glove, one to warm a winter days. We don’t have to say I love you quite as often as we used to. Old love just goes without saying…but we’ll still say it anyway.”
There’s something beautifully simple about that. I see that in my Grandparents marriage. I see that in my parents and in-laws marriage. And I’m already seeing that in my own marriage.
My husband and I have been married almost 7 years now. Some days it feels like 21!
Our days are ordinary. We’re in the exhausting stage of parenting little ones. We have a toddler with another baby due next month. My husband works long hours as teacher and athletic director at one of our local Lutheran schools. I work long hours keeping things running as smoothly as I can at home.
We fall into bed late at night and wake before we are ready. We don’t have time for the long dinner conversations of our dating days. We don’t go out on dates regularly at all. Our budget is tight and the household projects are never done. There are always diapers to be changed, papers to grade, laundry to do and dishes to wash. We’re well past the honeymoon stage and are fully aware that marriage is hard work. Yet, I chose to give thanks for our ordinary days and ordinary love.
It’s easy to overlook the ones we love another. It’s easy to get caught up in the hustle of everyday life. That’s why I chose to give thanks as I remember the ordinary ways we show our love to one another.
I love my husband through the constant cycles of laundry and packing of school lunches.
My husband loves me by working hard for our family so our children have a parent at home.
We both love our children by playing with and reading to and praying for them.
There are kisses good-bye at the door and text messages to share a reminder throughout the day. I do the grocery shopping and he pays the bills. No extravagant jewelry or elaborate date nights. Just simple moments shared with the man I love.
So, regardless of how you celebrated Valentine’s Day, remember to thank God for the ordinary moments of love He has given you. Remember to love the ones that are right in front of you, and please remember this.
We don’t have to say I love you quite as often as we used to…but we still say it anyway.
What ordinary moments of love can you give thanks for today?
Thank you for this sweet and encouraging reminder. I’m glad you included it in this year’s Valentines email.
The Magic of Ordinary Days is my favorite Hallmark movie too, so much so that I have a copy of the DVD! Love the reminder that love is so much more than hearts and flowers!
It is a wonderful movie. I just read the book that the movie was based on, and can’t believe I hadn’t done that before! It was lovely too. And yes, love is so much more than just flowers.
The Magic of Ordinary Days is one of my favorite movies too! When we had the Hallmark channel, I loved to watch it. This is a great reminder that love is found in the little (and sometimes big) things from day to day.
Oh, that makes me smile, Emily! I love all Hallmark movies but “The Magic of Ordinary Days” really is special. It’s actually one of those movies I would buy someday, simply because it applies to all of us as we love our spouses.
Hi, Kristen. I think we all managed to get caught up in the commotion of Valentine’s Day, and we sometimes forget that old love, true love, real love, is so much more! Love the post!
Thanks, Molly! Old, true, real love lasts – and that is the blessing that lasts year round!
I totally agree! We did our special Valentine’s day as a family, with a family dinner. We don’t need the big date night or verrrrrry expensive flowers or jewelry or trips… My husband and I have taken the time to get to know each others love languages and speak them often, even when we don’t have time, or honestly, the desire. Yes, we are likely ‘boring old married folks’ to most, but if you look closely perhaps you would see the simple blessings God has bestowed upon us, through our marriage, through loving Him and seeking Him, first. I doubt many cameras would want to follow us through a typical day and give us millions of dollars, but I also know we are rich beyond measure, in ways fuller than we ever imagined! It’s all in your perspective and having your focus on the one who can fill you beyond measure, give you strength, and love you unconditionally!
Unconditional love is such a blessing. Simple blessings, indeed, are some of the more cherished in marriage. And knowing your spouse’s love language is SO helpful!
This post! Yesterday, I experienced one of those beautiful quiet moments. My husband was just chatting with our son and I thought, “I am so blessed. I love him more now than I did in those adventurous dating years.”
It’s so heartbreaking to see some couples become dissatisfied when things get quiet because that’s when the real love happens!
I agree completely, Allison! Marriage changes you. It doesn’t always have those mountain tops of when you are dating, but the love changes and grows and deepens with time. It reminds me that love is a choice. I’m giving thanks with you for the blessings of a loving marriage!